So, I am back at work now! It is hard to be here I can't imagine what it is like for people that don't like their job or the people they work with. I love it here but I want nothing more than to be at home. I hope this gets easier. If not I am not sure how long I can take this. It isn't just that I don't get to spend time with Samantha it is everything. When am I supposed to clean the house, fix diner or go to the store. If I do any of that it takes away from what little time I have with her. It didn't help that my car broke down this week and we had to spend time dealing with that. PS I got a new car. Anyway to be completely honest it is like why do people even have kids if they can't spend any time with them. IT SUCKS. Before I had her I never thought I wanted to stay at home but now I wish I could and hate that I can't. It is so weird because everything people tell you about having a kid is true but you can't really know what it means until you have one. I love her more than anything and I just want to hang out with her. I wish I could go back to February 18th knowing what I know now. Okay I will stop bitching about this.